unanswered? Suppose Superlative Help for Information Technologists
got infected by an e-mail virus that sent a Nigerian money laundering
note to Acme Support Services.
"Thank you for contacting Acme Support Services. How can I be of
"Everything is hunky-dory here at Superaltive Help for Information
Technologists. What can we do for you?"
"Um... not a thing. You contacted us. What's your technical issue?"
"We don't have any technical issues that we know of. Perhaps I can
interest you in a three year contract for unlimited telephone
support? This week only, it's a low $39.95."
"Thank you for contacting Acme Support Services. If there's anything
further we can do to help you, please don't hesitate to get in touch."
"Thank you for e-mailing us. We're here to help. Keep our contact
information handy. You never know when you might want a friend on the
other end of the phone."
"Look, if you don't have a problem, stop sending me e-mail already! I
can't let a message go unanswered! Every time you send me a message,
I have to write back."
"Why do you keep responding? I can't close this ticket until you
haven't responded for at least 15 minutes. Please don't reply to this
"You're not getting this are you? I CAN'T stop or I'll lose my job."
"Well, I can't stop either."
"Don't write back."
... and so forth ...